Day 9

Midday

It is thundering, and I'm listening to "Crystal" on Olivia's mix. Kun Mae is washing my school uniform. I start on Thursday. This morning, we went to the store and Kun Mae kept reminding me of my own mom, running around and buying everything for me, like my mom did before I left. Even thinking about it makes me teary. Before that, we went to buy my uniform. we got three skirts, three shirts, a belt and shoes and socks. Then we went to get my name embroidered on the shirts - Sukalaya Inthajak. While we waited at the embroidery place, I practiced numbers and some vocabulary with Kun Mae, and the shopkeeper smiled. It was very sweet, welcoming.

I'm listening to 'Big Girls Don't Cry' and I had a revelation. A verbal one, so I can write it down. I need to understand - it will be a year before I see my parents again. My sister again. My friends again. A year. This is my life. Now I have to understand that. I don't yet, but I know I will have to. I need to stop thinking about going back. Goddess, it's hard. It's not that I don't want to know my family or the culture. I just want to press fast-forward so I can have the knowledge of the language, and their love, and then go back to my family.

Ten after Eight

I tried a lot of new food. Durian, rambutan, little green fruits, guava - and I just sent a mass e-mail to people at home and checked facebook. I actually feel okay about it. I don't want to use facebook that much while I'm here, or e-mail. It's so different from letters. You don't have to think about what you say because it gets there in 30 seconds. It doesn't mean as much. It closes the gap, but in a bad way.

We visited the stadium - athletic complex and while Fifa went to swim, we (Kun Poh and Bei-Deue and I) walked around, and Kun Poh asked me about Meadville. We talked, and it was nice. Simple. People connecting. Bai-Deue is so shy. She is very sweet, and when she smiles, I can really see her. She helped me today - we made a drawing of a person and labeled parts, and then objects around the house.

After we got back, I sat with Kun Poh in the kitchen and he talked with me. I gave him the letter from my parents, and he spoke at length about a difference between Thai people and Americans and Europeans - that Thai people care so much, and want to make me a part of their family. He says they care so much it might seem like an invasion of privacy, but it isn't. They really care, and love me. He was so sincere - it was lovely to hear. He really ment it. I gave him, Kun Mae, Bai Deue, and Ah-nam their presents, but Fifa was still swimming. I will give his to him tomorrow. Now, bedtime.